Amman. Human life is unequal, with material, social, scientific and practical disparities, and everyone's way, style, achievements, disappointments and triumphs.
But there are those who compare themselves to others all the time, so what's the impact on their working and social lives? How can one be more confident?
Comparison with others is a tired trap
Sociology researcher Dr. Fadia Ibrahim considers that comparison with others is a tired trap in which some individuals may fall, causing them anxiety, fatigue and dissatisfaction.
Fadia tells Al Jazeera Net that "comparing oneself to others can make a spiteful and envious person out of you, generating a sense of jealousy, despair and frustration, only because some people have preceded you in achieving. This is of course indicative of lack of self-confidence and lack of access to the stage of complacency. "
Compare your achievements to your ambitions
To get rid of this feeling, people should only set their own goals without any comparison, not the luckiest or the least fortunate. Just compare yourself, compare your achievements to your ambitions, goals and even dreams. We must always strive for the real and natural hard work that brings us to our goals, not to what others have achieved. "We must always be proud of our achievements, no matter how small or simple, and through satisfaction, work and self-development we strive to achieve our goals."
Ibrahim cautions against the form in which our social life, relations and consumer behaviour determine the value of a human being by what he owns or by how much he consumes. "This is what the digital revolution and social media sites have helped to promote, which shows us every minute what others are accomplishing and what they own. We inadvertently put ourselves in comparison with others and view life as unfair, becoming heavy and difficult for us."
Ibrahim continues: "If there is really a need for comparison, then be the positive comparison by which we create an incentive to develop ourselves and be like others with their achievements and successes."
Self-love and respect
The sociologist says: "Man is the child of his environment, so we are keen to provide a healthy environment for our children through education, to cultivate in them self-love, respect and self-confidence, and to keep them out of comparison between their brothers or colleagues by studying, because this sows the seed of looking at the lives of others always, and busy developing our lives."
It adds: "Even the working environment must be sound and free from negative competition. Managers and leaders must always create an atmosphere of solidarity, help and celebrate collective achievements at the expense of individual achievements. If someone is late, they must constantly be supported and stand by them to show their best. If there is a successful and distinguished person, there must also be joy for his success and support in moving forward without envy or jealousy, as individual achievements ultimately fall in the collective interest of the institution, society and even the homeland.
"Positive and negative" comparison
For his part, psychologist Dr. Ali El-Ghazzo believes that comparing oneself with others is on two types: first, positive comparison, when one compares oneself to another by looking at his skills, abilities and energies, which reflect positively on his life. Here, the individual is able to accomplish and develop and looks at himself with respect and self-esteem, which in fact increases his confidence.
The other type is quite the opposite comparison, which is "negative". Here, an individual's perception of himself is inferior, in the sense that he sees his skills and abilities as weak and cannot reach others. This situation begins with the entry into self-blame and reprimand of conscience. What is feared in this case is that one's self-esteem and self-esteem will be lower, and it may develop and worsen into psychiatric conditions, such as depression, stress and anxiety in a situation faced with areas of life.
The invasion explains: "Here we advise these people to move away from this comparison, and if it is necessary, it must be motivated by change and development."
He adds: "A human being who is equal and natural and who is perceived to possess skills and abilities, is preoccupied and does not compare them with the skills and abilities of others, but always works towards self-fulfilment through his achievements, and does not repeat it, either with himself or in front of others: I worked... Or I'm done; internal motivation and personal achievement shall remain ".
How to be more confident?
Under the heading "How to increase your self-confidence", the Very Well Mind website states that self-confidence indicates a general sense of confidence in your ability to control your life, or may be more specific to the situation, you may have high self-confidence in a particular area of experience, but you feel less confident in other areas.
A healthy level of self-confidence can help you become more successful in your personal and professional life. Research has found, for example, that more trusted people tend to be more successful academically.
Important tips
The site offered tips to make one more confident, the most important of which are:
1-Stop comparing yourself to others: When you notice that you are making comparisons, first remind yourself that doing so is not helpful, life is not a competition. If you are envious of someone else's life, it is also useful to remember your strengths and successes. Keep a diary of gratitude and better remember the areas of life you enjoy.
2-Surround yourself with positive people: Take a moment, think about how you feel about your friends. Are they lifting you or frustrating you? Do they judge you constantly or do they accept you for what you are? Those who spend time with them can influence your thoughts and attitudes towards yourself, perhaps more than you realize. So you need to be alert to how others feel. So, surround yourself with people who love you and want the best for you, and look for other positive people who can help you build your confidence.
3-Take care of your body: This advice is based on the rule that it is difficult to feel good about yourself if you are abusing your body. When you do self-care, including diet, physical exercise, meditation, relaxation and good sleep, you do something positive for your mind, body and soul, and you will naturally feel more confident as a result.
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